An Unfortunate Reflection

That’s the biggest problem
with something as glorified
as the mirror
When you look into it,
it never quite captures
the image you hold in
your own mind
 
Sometimes I gaze
through windows
That’s something you can’t do
with a mirror
Like a mirror stops
          with you
But then I peel away the layers
of an unfortunate reflection
as I watch every last regret
wither and die
 
The mirror is bigger
than logic
Stands above time
I peer from down below
at something I’ve always hated
from day one
 
I believe
that’s what it means
to be an adult
It means regrets remorse &
indecisions
There’s no adulthood without
shame and disappointment
Some of us
grow up faster than others
I suppose/
 
So here in the mirror
there is so much
misguided grandeur
We the vain have sprouted
fangs and wings and horns
But in the mirror
we release the veil
I see everything I wish to
forget
I always imagine
smashing it to pieces
because the face that Isee
is a stranger to me
 
So I smile and grin
all at the same time
I wink and sneer
because every facial expression
just seems so benign
I flirt and curse
with the devil inside
 
I kiss the tinted car window
The shadow of myself
is freeing to be seen
as it leaves the scene of my
own dire self-destruction
 
If only the mirror showed me
a blank slate
I might be okay/