Discharged

I was discharged
from the psyche ward
I was smoking crack
had taken
a bottle of sleeping pills
to put myself to sleep
          forever
 
There was a guy
I met in the ward
named Eddie
He was hooked
on OCs
 
 
We were both released
the same day
exchanged numbers
made a pact
that we’d stick together and
get clean
 
 
Later that night
I played Richard Hell
& the Voidoids
on my discman
          as I walked
 
flirted with the mirror
ripped up my shirt
jumped and stammered
looked toward outer space
                         and screamed
through the void
Only God could hear
the joy
It felt good
to be out of that place
 
When the song ended
I passed Greg the cash
went home and
snorted lines then
 
called Eddie
said I screwed up
I’m sorry, man
but I got high again
He was quiet
like there
was no one there
and then he said:
Oh, me too.
Oxis, man?
 
He was silent
I imagine he nodded
then dropped the phone
clunk--he was gone///
just like that
 
 
I spent the rest
of the night
staring at my own
reflection
 
Boy did it feel good
to be out of that place