What Lies Beneath

​Last night I went
to the local open-mike
I knew a lot
of the regular faces there
One after the next
poets read their hearts out
upon the stage
One after the next
people were cheering
clicking fingers
clapping when the poem ended
Then my turn came
 
I was called up
to the stage
A silence deafening
shot through the venue
This was it
This was my turn
I stood up there
thumbed through my book
for the perfect poem
Found it
I read it as was rehearsed
time & time again
and then
I came to the end
No one clapped
No one snapped
No one cheered
at all
only their eyes were aghast
jaws hanging
A few beats passed
The maddening tension pursued
They were all so shocked
Did I hit a nerve?
Say something that resonated
 
But then
the laughter
so loud the way it resounded
from wall to wall
boxing me in
I felt confined by it
Claustrophobic
They were all pointing
and laughing
That’s when I noticed
 
I was naked
stark     naked
Like I was a kid again
going to school
only to realize
I was naked
in class
in front of all my laughing peers
 
But then
I didn’t care anymore
This was who I was
If you didn’t like it,
I didn’t care
because this
was me in my fullest
This
was what poetry meant to me
Getting up there and revealing
my deepest darkest self
 
I closed the book
and strolled through
the volley of laughter
For once
I was satisfied
For once
I was okay with who I was
For once
I woke up
 
and realized it was only a dream